I sit here on December 19th, and as so many others do this time of year, I am taking stock. Wins. Losses. Things I’m grateful for. Things I wish had gone better. The question I ask myself: did I make this world a better place this year?
I might be one of very few Americans who has never watched the Christmas Classic ‘It’s a Wonderful Life.’ I’m not a Christian for one. I don’t watch a lot of television for two. And I avoid Christmasy things for three.
Last night, however, my husband and I went to see a stage production of the story, done as a radio drama. We have both performed in radio dramas, and that was the draw for us.
I never realized how politically radical a story it was. How existential. In spite of myself, I loved it. I never realized how pertinent it really was. I wonder if the thousands upon thousands of people who watch it each year, appreciate that. I think, how delightfully subversive if they don’t. But George Bailey isn’t the only one looking at his life, with or without a Clarence of their own.
And so, my evaluation:
Losses:
A dear friend died, suddenly. Nothing could have been done. That was enough.
The world lost too many to foolishness and stubborn pride. I may not have known them, but I feel their loss and regret, to those left behind.
Gratitude:
I’m still here.
My husband and children (including my son-in-law) are still here. I love them and they love me. I was finally able to hug them all this year. I have not taken a single hug for granted since.
I spent time with my sister in a place of wonderful memories. That was a blessing.
My friends are healthy and whole, and I was able to actually see and hug them this year. I have spent more time with them (if virtually) than I normally do. That was a blessing. I love them, and they love me.
I’m still working at a job I enjoy. My husband decided it was time to retire. It was the right decision.
I have a cozy, warm home. Food enough to eat, and money to share to assure others in my community too, can eat.
I was able to publish two books under my pseudonym, bringing the total to five.
Years of hard work and planning are making my (eventual) retirement a (modest) reality.
Things I wish to work on:
Be kinder.
Speak so others will listen.
Practice patience with my family, my friends, co-workers, and myself.
Wishes for the New Year:
I don’t know that I have any influence over these things, but I wish for them nevertheless:
That those who are filled with stubborn pride will allow themselves to see the light and get vaccinated, and boosted before it is too late for them and those they love.
That we as a nation will share our bounty, and vaccines with the rest of the world to stop the scourge from mutating and spreading further.
That selfishness will once again become a societal vice, so we can finally get to work on reversing climate change, bringing an end to pollution of the air, earth and sea.
That women will maintain and regain the right to choose what happens to their bodies.
That sensible gun legislation will begin as the first step in a long road to making our children’s schools and public life safer.
That the bastards who tried to overthrow our free and fair elections will be cast from office, and made to pay for their crimes. Including those at the top. Especially those at the top.
The Connecticut Writers' Circle 